Mood: incredibly lazy.
Hating: that I have no motivation to work on any of the 101 things I have to finish in the imminent future. Ah, the art of procrastination...I do believe I am most creative when I'm avoiding other work.
Loving: the beautiful snow that's falling tonight.
Lip-syncing: Red Jumpsuit Apparatus -- Face Down
“I...I...” She couldn't figure out why, but the words couldn’t get past her lips. She had the perfect ones, but they just wouldn't come out. It didn’t matter. She knew that he would never listen. She should have known better. He growled low in his throat, before throwing the book in his hands at the lamp beside the living room couch, watching with satisfaction as it crashed to the ground and shattered across the hardwood floor, taking small chunks out of the smooth wood with its now jagged edges. She jumped, frightened by the aggression. He snarled at her then, and she quickly raised her eyes to meet his stormy glare.
“What?” He asked lowly, sending shivers of horror down her spine. She bit her lip, refusing to evoke his anger anymore. He smirked before striding over to her and slamming her into the adjacent wall. He grasped a handful of her long hair before sneering into her face.
“What? You have anything to say, you ungrateful little bitch?” He pulled, bringing her quivering face in closer. She dug her teeth into her lip even further. “What the fuck was running through that shit-filled head of yours? You thought what? If you tell that cunt, he’ll come running to the rescue? That jackass is an excuse for a man,” he raved at her, tightening his grip in her hair and yanking at her scalp.
“He’s not a-a...c-c...that. He’s th-the neighbour, and he j-just wanted to know-”
“It’s our life. What we do is none of his business,” he cut her off. She squeezed her eyes shut, trying to stop the tears that were forming as his hold in her hair increased.
“It’s just that...well, he s-said he heard some sc-screaming from last night and he saw the-the...on my ch-cheek, and I couldn’t j-just lie to him, s-so...” she managed to get out before he seized just below her jaw and raised her higher. The foot height difference between the two didn’t seem to faze him as he drew her up to his level. She struggled not to choke, knowing it would only lead to more punishment.
“You couldn’t just lie to him?” He asked quietly. His low voice scared her more than the screaming had. She began to thrash about, violently trying to breathe. His fingers clenched, digging painfully into her throat. Tears ran down unbidden as her vision swam. He watched her for a moment, before snorting in disgust and releasing her. She slid down the wall, desperately gasping for air while running her hands along her neck, feeling the fingerprints beginning to swell already. At least her cheek and neck would have matching bruises. She glanced up through the mess of her long eyelashes to see him standing there, looming over her. Her breath caught in her throat, terrified of what was to come.
He took a deep breath, clenching his fist, before he closed his eyes and turned around, heading towards the door. She froze. No, he couldn’t walk away from her. Neither of them had ever walked away before. If he left, she would have no one. No one at all. She had always been abandoned by everyone else, until he came. Now he was there. Always there. She wanted him there. He had been angry with her before, but the mistakes were hers. He just had to show her what was right and wrong. She needed him to show her. She watched as he got closer and closer to the door. He couldn’t. He wouldn’t. She jumped up then, dashing over, trying desperately to catch him before she was left alone. She grasped his arm to calm him down, but he let out a roar of outrage and swung around, punching her hard in the mouth. She collapsed to the ground cradling her jaw, staring up at him in surprise and unmasked fear. She scooted backwards until her back was propped up against the couch. There was no way to really tell at first glance, but her jaw seemed to be broken, rapidly swelling behind her tiny hands. He smiled evilly before reached down to grab the nearest object: a construction work boot. He often left his pair lying around the door when he got home, exhausted after a long day. Normally she would straighten up silently, having already prepared dinner, but her little trip to the hospital had ruined their routine. His face hardened as he thought about the neighbour taking her for medical attention. She had just let him touch her, like some commonplace whore. But she was his. No one else should ever even look at her. His grip tightened. Her eyes grew wide as she caught sight of what was in his hand, while he just smiled back and strolled up casually to her. He could see how she was shaking violently now, but no emotions except joy crossed his mind. She would never do anything like that again. He gestured for her to stand up, waiting impatiently while she achingly rose to her feet.
Raising his other hand, he watched as she cowered in front of him, before reaching into his shirt pocket and pulling out his cigarettes and lighter. Carefully placing the unlit stick in his mouth, he stroked her face lovingly, watching her exhale of relief as she closed her eyes before hearing the snick of the lighter near her nose. Her eyes snapped back open and revealed more fear as he lit the cigarette between his lips, smoke swiveling up into the air of their house. Before she could draw in another breath, he slammed the heel of his boot into the other side of her face, her cries of pain giving him more and more pleasure.
Dropping the boot with the an echoing thud, he smiled as he took another breath of nicotine. She gave him a confused look, her back still pressed against the couch. He took a quick drag, before grabbing her right wrist in a vice-like grip. He smirked and pressed the cigarette to her arm, watching in satisfaction as her face contorted in horror as she tried to hold back her screams. After a few seconds, the stench of burning flesh and sulphur sickened him and he released her. He glanced down at the black ashes sitting on her bare arm as the tears poured down her face. Staring at the new set of marks on her, she didn’t notice him drop the cancer stick and reach for her face. She let out a whimper as he clenched her swollen jaw. Pulling her up to meet his lips roughly, he silenced her cries of pain. When he pulled away, her face was torn between conflicting emotions. Running a hand through her sweaty and now tangled locks, he let a genuine smile flicker across his face before sliding his hand down to pull her back to him. Kissing her passionately, he left her breathless as he tugged her body closer. Letting her lips go, he lowered his mouth to her neck, watching as he raised goosebumps along her skin. Faintly brushing his lips across the sensitive spot behind her ear, he whispered a faint, “I love you.” Hearing her sharp intake of breath, he smirked before stepping back and making his way up the wooden staircase. She crumpled to the ground then, her battered body shaking with broken sobs of confusion and torment once again.
A pebble in the water makes a ripple effect
Every action in this world will bear a consequence
If you wade around forever you will surely down
I see what's going down...
Do you feel like a man when you push her around?
Do you feel better now, as she falls to the ground?
Well, I'll tell you my friend
One day this world's gonna end
As your lies crumble down...